Mark Pellegrino in Supernatural: S7E17 Lucifer is driving Sam mad

Sam has been up for five days, and he can’t take much more. Lucifer’s still having fun.

Drug dealer: What the hell d’you take, anyway?

Sam: Nothing.

Drug dealer: Shut up.

Lucifer: No, he’s telling the truth. Burned through that last beer hours ago. Right about the time Dean passed out. Come on, Sam. Tell the nice tweaker. You’d be sleeping by now if the devil would just leave you alone for five seconds. Stupid Satan. Chasing you all the way to… where the hell are we?

Sam: Argh! I just need some rest.

Lucifer: Hey. Sam. Try the hand scar.

Sam: Ugh!

Drug dealer: How many days you been up, anyway?

Lucifer: Four! Oh, wait, scratch that. Five.

Drug dealer: Hey, hold up! Wait! Hold up! You want a knock out? I can knock you out.

Lucifer: Good morning to you, good morning to you, our day is beginning, so good morning to you. I thought you liked my singing!

Lucifer: Pills? You do get that you’re just bringing free drugs to the party, right? I am inside you, Sam. Hey, Sam. What’s the longest a normal human being’s ever gone without sleep? Eleven days. Hey. You always wanted to be normal, Sam! If y’are, you’ll be dead in a week!

Lucifer: I’m just sayin’. Back when you had no soul, you never had to sleep. Ah, Mr. Helpless. Pull up a six-pack, buddy.

Dean: How you feeling?

Sam: Maybe you should cancel my UFC fight.

Lucifer: Yeah. Keep that sense of humour, Sam. It’ll get you through this.

Dean: Sam, I’m gonna find you help.

Lucifer: Now, that sounded a little cynical.

Sam: I don’t think it’s out there, Dean.

Dean: We don’t know that.

Sam: We know better than most. It’s all snake oil. Last faith healer we hooked up with had a reaper on a leash. Remember?

Dean: Yeah, Sam, I remember.

Sam: I’m just saying.

Dean: What? That you don’t want my help?

Sam: No, I’m just sayin’, don’t do this to yourself.

Dean: Sam, if I don’t find something.

Sam: Then I’ll die.

Lucifer: Oh, you’re upsetting me!

Sam: Dean, we knew this was coming.

Dean: No.

Sam: When you put my soul back,

Dean: No.

Sam: Cas warned you about all the crap it would

Dean: Screw Cas! Quit being Dalai frickin’ Yoda about this, okay? Get pissed!

Sam: I’m too tired. This is what happens when you throw a soul into Lucifer’s dog bowl. And you think there’s just gonna be some cure out there?

Lucifer: Oh, you guys are having a moment.

Dean: I am so sorry to have bothered you.

Lucifer: Narcissistic personality disorder. Okay, now, this one I could have. Sets unrealistic goals. Check. But! Trouble keeping healthy relationships? Not so sure about that one. Thoughts?

Sam: What are you talking about?

Lucifer-as-doctor: Well, I’m talking about the truly elegant torture I have prepared for you today, Sam.

Sam: Just stay the hell away from me.

Lucifer: But it’s, it’s so nice chatting. Sam, I hate these one-sided conversations. Come on, buddy. Engage. Sam? You, me, locked ward. Is it me, or is this just like the cage?

Lucifer: You know, you’re actually keeping it together better than I thought. Kind of… the way someone pinned under a bus keeps it together.

Sam: None of this is real.

Lucifer: And yet, you know what really sucks? It doesn’t really matter. Because I won. Your madness won. I mean, look at you. It’s hard to believe you were the guy that saved the world once. Mmm! Sammy. What’ll it be today? Maggots again, or, uh, tapeworm?

Sam: Thanks.

Marcus: Yeah, no problem. How you doing?

Sam: Uh. Little better. That girl, uh, Marin.

Marcus: Look, I’m not really supposed to talk about it. Let’s just say, unlike you, she didn’t get here ’cause of no accident.

Marin: You’re worse. Your organs need sleep, you know. Your hair and nails are gonna fall out, and your kidneys are gonna shut down. I saw it in a movie. Sorry.

Sam: So, um, your brother, when did he pass?

Marin: Uh, last year.

Sam: Do you see him? So… he just talks to you. I bet at first it wasn’t so bad. You must have missed him. Did you just hear him at the house?

Marin: Here too. Whenever I’m alone. I can always tell he’s coming because I get these chills.

Sam: You’re gonna have to do this on your own. It’s okay. I’m okay. I’m just having a little…

Lucifer: Brown acid moment.

Sam: Dizzy thing. It’ll pass.

Lucifer: Definitely. When your heart stops.

Doctor: Sam? How you feeling now?

Lucifer: His soul is broken, Doc. Can you give him a pill?

Doctor: I can’t give you any more medication. The potential for overdose is too great. We need to talk about surgical solutions.

Sam: Surgical?

Lucifer: Ooh. Lobotomy?

Doctor: It’s okay. We’re not talking lobotomy here.

Lucifer: Darn.

Uh oh.